I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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