doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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