I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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