I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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