is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
is it fun? or sober?
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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