I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
There's even glitter on my cock...
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