Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
You work out of a Hotel?
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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