can we get nightvision for the apartment?
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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