This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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