im so drunk with asians
where?
always
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
