I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
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