Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
