i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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