She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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