he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
