so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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