It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Cover your peen. We're going out.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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