Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
