Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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