Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
