OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize