So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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