So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
