he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
