Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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