new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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