There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize