i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
