just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
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How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
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Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
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