if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
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