also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I just gargled with NyQuil
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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