I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
