No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize
