shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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