She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize