At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
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