I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Randomize
