Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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