Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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