If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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