i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
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I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
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He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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