have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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