Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
