Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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