I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
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I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
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And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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