Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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