Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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