would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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