sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
