Well douche your snatch and let's go!
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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